Running After Money.

It's my 6th day of work already, so that means I've been working 6 days out of the possible 7 in a week. Wow. Anyways today - or maybe I should say yesterday, considering it's past 12 am - was supposed to be my off day. But yesterday my supervisor requested i work today as well. Even after denying the idea initially and explaining to him that I had school the following day, he still was persistent. He said this one thing to psycho me "can la... earn a little bit more money only lor," so there you have it. I went to work today so that an extra 15 bucks or so could be added to my wallet. -.-


Nonetheless, it was an interesting experience. I don't think many new guys get to be a food runner in their first week, like I was today. My name was not on the initial list, so the supervisor just added me under the 'food runner collumn'. It's not as easy as it seems okay! There are so many items on the menu and i kept on having to ask the chefs what it was I was serving. This one chef probably got irritated and then chose not to reply me. He pointed to receipt instead, which stated the short form of the food I was carrying. Ok la, at least now I know how to identify the food I serve now.


My one screw-up today was how i held the hot plate. Apparently you're supposed to hold it with your forearm below the wooden platform and ur palm supporting it, with the side where there is no sauce facing you. I held it with my fingers at the sides... lol. The plate was damn hot can? I knew it would be hot, BUT MAN that was FLAME GRILLING HOTNESS! I burnt my fingers carrying out to the customer lol. Furthermore, the sauce was splattering all around (because it's poured onto the hot plate and it starts sizzling) and i got minor burns on my forearms as well. Lol. My supervisor caught me and after a short discussion with the other supervisor, he brought me back into the kitchen and taught me how to hold it.





I told myself to remain motivated in this job and keep on doing my best even though I may be new and suck at lots of things - that's exactly what I did today. I managed to get past the initial blurness and then picked up my pace to match the rest of my co-workers. A buddy of mine helped me by teaching what I should do and how. I wanted a waiter's job, so now I huess I have to deal with whatever shit I may get from doing this.

My first waitering job and despite all the setbacks, I'm still lovin' what I do! :D

To my bearbear.

That's right. This post is for you. You seem so adamant on letting the entire world know about us in your blog, I didn't think you'd mind me having this one post to tell everyone that reads this blog (there are not many so no worries).

I have been waiting my whole life for someone to fill that emptiness I've always felt. To be honest, I thought you'd fill that void. When James first introduced you to me, he pm-ed me seperately from our conference and told me;

"aj. don't let this one slip away."

"why?"

"well you wanted a bf. this could be your chance."

You said you started smiling again after you met me, I could see in those beautiful eyes how much you wanted me. You made me smile again after a long time too, but that smile was in no way strong enough to overcome what I felt in my heart - it told me you were not the one.

I liked you more the more i met you, but never in the way you liked me. In fact, when I was away from you, I felt the most at peace - all that told me exactly what my heart really wanted (or did not want).

I dreaded the day I would not want you to be my boyfriend, but it came eventually. Like I told you that night we met, I cannot force myself to like someone when I don't.

After countless times of getting my own heart broken, I never imagined I'd be the one to break someone elses' heart. At least I did it graciously and did not walk away without closure. Sad thing is you didn't really seem to appreciate that. You dont know how much hurt and sadness I felt to tell you what I did. I ate myself up because of it. Maybe Matthew, Marr and Kelvin would know, but you dont.

I know its easy for you to think I dont care, that I'm the bad guy, that I mistreated you. I hope you see otherwise soon. The first time I saw you I saw your eyes; I peeked into your soul and I knew how innocent and tender you truly were. Characteristics that were not meant for me I guess.

Alas, I don't want this post to be all emo and sappy (because im starting to tear already -.-). Remember how on our first meeting we went up to that block and played with each other at the stairs? I never did that before. We kept saying "stop it," when we both knew we wanted it hahaha. That was fun.

Remember how I felt so guilty for being late when I met you on our second date and I brought you chocolates? I never gave anyone chocolates before, so count yourself honored. Holding your hand in the movies the entire time was the most secure feeling I've ever felt. I don't think you knew that. ;)

Remember how we sat in front of cathay and just talked until i missed the train to meet kelvin? I enjoyed that night, really. Was the most romantic thing I've done in a long time.

And i hope its all these that you will remember from me, and not those bad things you've built up in your head. I know what I will remember.

You're the sweetest guy I've known till date, and I am not just saying that. So here's to you paul. I hope to see you smile again someday and have those beautiful eyes of yours brightened once again.



Have a good life.

aj.

http://notsoreallylor.blogspot.com/2009/10/trust.html