Life is probably the most interesting on Earth. I mean, each living being on this planet has a life that is so different from every other life; and it's simply spectacular what life can do.
Being away from this blog for ages, my life has, naturally, been incredibly eventful. And the only reason I'm back here today is because my besty said "it's been a long time since you've blogged."
I realised I've transformed so much on the inside, it's almost as if the same Ajmal doesn't exist anymore.
It's no doubt that being gay has influenced and impacted the way I live my life in a large way. However, I'd never imagine it would be of that magnitude. For some time now, my life has been all about, as Lady Gaga's song goes; Boys, boys, boys! You don't wanna know what I'd gotten into, really.
As is many things in life, nothing is for certain, and nothing is completely secure, especially relationships. Uncountable heartbreaks had left my soul drained and my body unable to battle the challenges of everyday life and its perpetual temptations. I merely let myself drift in the sands of time - something I would previously NEVER let myself do.
As my mind transformed, so did my life. It's just a testament to what thinking does to your life. I can tell you that I'm no longer that innocent little boy from secondary school. Its my last year as a teenager and I'm really glad i experienced what I did.
A close friend of mine asked me plainly - what happened to the Ajmal I used to know? I did not know how to answer him, because I knew exactly what he was talking about. For a while in my life, I looked in the mirror and did not recognise the man I saw.
No sensation is the same as when you once again realise for yourself where you want your life to go. My friend may have asked a simple question, but it set off a flurry of thoughts in my head. And I used to be the one who would set his life in perspective, and tell him to wake up. Aah how the tables have turned! I cannot say that everything in life is now set in the right motion, but I can say it's somewhat back on track. Still hang onto old habits, but its no longer a cause for distraction - or at least, it shouldn't be.
For now I'm just going to sit back and watch life unfold it's magnificence unto my undeserving eyes, and have faith that things will work out for the better. I have never regretted things that have happened to me and this time its no different. You know what they say, 'everthing happens for a reason.'
LIVE your life, not survive it. But don't restrict yourself to what people say it should be. It's your life and you decide its course. We LIVE and we LEARN.
Cheers to everyone who lives.
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